I got a haircut the other day.  Mid-way through, the woman said “It’s kind of pokey, your hair, isn’t it?”.  I kind of nodded, but I was actually thinking “what the hell does that mean?  Is pokey hair good or bad?”

This uncertainty bothered me for hours, so when I got home I went to the only source of true and verifiable information that exists – Google.  Which naturally led me to the best / worst book of all time…

From the publisher’s website:

Penis Pokey is an illustrated board book with a large die-cut hole in its center. Every spread features a dazzling full-color illustration with one thing missing — a banana, perhaps, or a fire hose, or a sea serpent. Male readers can complete the illustrations using the talents God has given them.

I’m pretty sure every person who purchases this book is automatically added to the FBI / CIA / RCMP / Scotland Yard / Interpol database of potential sex offenders.  And if they’re not, then they probably should be.